I have always had an intense fear and discomfort with confrontation. I am a classic people pleaser, which I strongly believe stems greatly from my struggles in friendships and past bullying. But I think this is something that a large majority of women experience because of the societal expectation for women to get along, be … [Read more…]
There was a point in time where I almost didn’t feel I had a choice in who I was friends with. If someone was willing to be my friend, I was going to take it, no matter what it entailed. The wider your community and the greater your sense of self-worth become, this mindset begins … [Read more…]
As I’ve navigated and observed my relationships with other women, there are countless roles I’ve witnessed women take on in social groups. There’s one in particular that I’ve noticed at every stage of my life that I think speaks to a larger issue with female socialization than we even realize. We all know that girl … [Read more…]
Self-talk is a critical component in building self-esteem and bringing us closer to the “best versions of ourselves.” I think we as women tend to fall into a trap of negative self-talk, because we’re constantly asked to compare ourselves to other women and ideals of femininity, and made to feel that we somehow don’t stack … [Read more…]
My latest post dealt with the necessity of acknowledging that girls bully and the significance of labeling these behaviors as such. But now I’m going to shift gears and contradict that notion; we need to find a new term for “girl bullying.” It’s a term I often use when giving the elevator pitch for my … [Read more…]
Since the beginning of my own experience with girl bullying in middle school, it has always struck me how few people have even heard of this as a specific issue. But what baffles me more is the amount of men and women I’ve encountered who seem to refuse to deem this as “bullying.” Too often … [Read more…]
One of my earliest posts dealt with the issue of gossiping and the role that talking about others has in friendships. But there is another function of this that I did not address, and one that I think can be rather illuminating. Do you ever find yourself repeatedly complaining to and confiding in a friend … [Read more…]
At the tail end of my friendship with my middle school clique, I first experienced the downsides to social media and the impact it can have on our wellbeing and relationships. I was in 9th grade and was away for the weekend with my parents, after my friend’s mother declined my mother’s request for me … [Read more…]
There are several correlations I’ve found between my undergrad training as an actor, and my experiences now as a social worker. But both careers rely heavily on a good self-care regimen. Both roles require the “player” to give and reveal so much of who they are, and absorb the emotions of others in a way … [Read more…]
Having distance from my experiences with girl bullying and a stronger sense of who I am has allowed me to revisit these memories with clarity, rather than emotion. However, I’m reminded every day of the impact those girls had on how I view and approach relationships; I often feel desperate when making plans with friends … [Read more…]